| January 8th, 2005 06:00 PM |
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| Riffhard |
John Knox may very well have been a Scot,but he started his church in Belfast.
Riffhard |
| January 9th, 2005 09:40 PM |
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| corgi37 |
Instead of a Jew list, we should have an Aussie list. Slowly but surely, we are taking over.
Up until very recently, Aussies were in charge of Ford, McDonalds, and of course, good old Rupie Murdoch.
Errol Flynn fucked and drank his way through countless Yanks. He was rumoured to have a 11 inch dicky. Which, i might add, is considered slightly below average here in Oz.
Miss Universe is Aussie.
Neighbours, Home and Away and Kylie Minogue have been polluting U.K. people's minds for years. Hell, even 1 hit wonders like Peter Andre have stolen probably the most famous titty model since Sam Fox! Right from under Poms noses. Titty girls usually go for soccer players, but when an Aussie comes to town, all bets are off.
The only realy thing we havent conquered is the porn world. Sure, we had some minor stars in the 80s-90's like Alice Springs and Sunny McKay, and a few more recently like Jodie Moore, Brandy Tyler and Bobbi Barrington, but our pathetic attempt to have our own industry was, well, pathetic.
I plan to change all that.
All i need is money, an expensive digital video camera, an editing suite and distribution deal. And most vital of all.
Permission from my wife.
P.S. I mean to make the XXX flicks, not for her to star in them. Not that she wouldnt, but i couldnt afford her salary. And imagine if she got DP'd by a couple of black studs and then decided to...
I'll stop there. |
| January 9th, 2005 10:55 PM |
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| Gazza |
Sunny McKay was indeed quite 'cute'. Alice Springs too, from what I remember.
Aside from the porn chicks, you left out some tasty 'mainstream' bints such as Elle McPherson.
The Errol Flynn thing is apparently a myth according to a TV programme I saw about him a couple of years ago. His todger was, apparently, average - by anyone's standards. Even mine. (the rumour as I remember it was actually 18 inches, not 11. This is still Flynn we're talkin' about, by the way, not me).
I wouldnt boast about Peter Andre, mate - seriously. Jordan's seen as a bit of a sleazy minger, anyway.
Murdoch. You wouldnt want to claim ownership of HIM would ya? He's now a US citizen anyway (I think he did that as it was the only way he could buy some of his newspapers or form his own TV company there or something). Shows how much he valued his nationality anyway. They're welcome to him!
..and you did provide the greatest cricketer of all time in "The Don". I dont think any sportsman in any field has ever been so undisputably so far ahead of the rest of his profession as Bradman was.
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| January 10th, 2005 12:37 AM |
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| corgi37 |
Yeah, he's pretty much a hero here. But, i hate cricket. He was also a bit of prick. Never drank, rumoured to pick his team on religious grounds, and was involved in some shady business stuff.
I prefer Keith Miller. To me, a real typical Aussie of that era. Dapper, disrespectful or authority, cheeky and fearless.
He was asked if he was ever scared out on the field.
He said: "Scared? Trying having a Messershcmidt up your ass!".
He used to infuriate Bradman by turning up for matches still in his tux! He'd been up all night having "fun" with the English chicks.
During one bombing run over Germany, he detoured his Mosquito off its course so he could fly over Beethoven's house!
Jordan is pretty much unknown here. I only know of her because a titty mag i get every week, People, mainly features alot of U.K. page 3 girls. And, believe me, Peter Andre is hated here so much. His "career" isnt alive like it is in the U.K. In fact, its 100% dead.
Other Aussies of note include the butler in Joe Millionaire who shares the same name as one of our famous blokes, Paul Hogan.
Then, there is George Miller who brought us Mad Max 1-3 and Babe.
We invented the "black box" flight recorder.
And the revolving clothes line. Hills Hoist we call it.
We made the 1st full length motion picture - "Story of the Kelly Gang". Funny how that other "Aussie" Mick Jagger also made a Ned Kelly film.
My family goes back to 1170 Scotland. 200 years before Braveheart or so. Sir Reginald was the main man i think, in or around, 1170. Not sure on exact dates, but i know their were no dvd's then.
In fact, my great-great-great etc grandmother was William Wallace's mummy. Look it up! It's all there. My tribe left Scotland for Ireland, where we had some fun for 400 years or so, starting religious fighting, then pissed off to America. After starting the War of Independance and the Civil war, not to mention other minor things, one of the gang went to Melbourne, Australia in search of gold in 1856.
And, that is that.
Except the bit about starting wars. We were peacful Presbitarians. If i even spelt the word right.
P.S. I just realised. What the hell has this got to do with Chris Jagger? |
| January 10th, 2005 08:34 AM |
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| glencar |
It all comes back to Chris Jagger, doesn't it? |
| January 10th, 2005 08:35 AM |
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| Gazza |
>Except the bit about starting wars. We were peacful Presbitarians. If i even spelt the word right.
Riffhard. We've got another one of the bastards!!
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| January 10th, 2005 08:45 AM |
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| Riffhard |
John Knox
Riffhard
Gazza
corgi
Riffhard |
| January 10th, 2005 06:50 PM |
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| corgi37 |
You lot aint Micks, are ya?
(loads blunderbus) |
| January 10th, 2005 08:01 PM |
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| Gazza |
** BLANK FRIGGIN STARE ** |
| January 10th, 2005 11:38 PM |
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| glencar |
Micks rule! |
| January 11th, 2005 11:29 PM |
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| corgi37 |
Do they? Do they really?
I could beat the Pope. He's a weaky.
And, Mel Gibson? A bloody weirdo!
Acutally, i might be Protestant. Or, is it Church of England?
I think my babies got christened at a Uniting Church, but that was my wifes fault. I said "Uniting is Catholic, arent they?" and she goes "No, no, no".
And during the service there was a tiny reference to the mackeral slapper church of Rome.
I nearly died!
But, i've known some ok Micks.
Our next door neighbour when i was a kid made the best banana sandwiches. Though, she did it tough with her kids. SHe was such a devout God-botherer. You know, dont do this, oh my kids are not like your ruffians.
So, her eldest has been married twice - Hell!
Her middle kid is a fag and shacks up with the multi-millionairre son of some Pommy actor (from that Hycinth Bucket show i think, but i could be wrong) - Anyway, he's a sodomite - Hell.
Elderst daughter, apart from playing doctors and nurses with a filthy protestant (or am i COE?) like me when i was 10, and also been divorced. And had an abortion!! - Hell!
Finally, youngest daughter is a compulsory liar. And, very, very fat - Hell!
So, all in all, i might turn to the Koran. They seem such sweet, gentle people. Though i might see if i can be the only muslim who eats pork. Man, i love roast pork and all that crackle!
I'm a W.A.S.P. -Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
P.S. I am circumcised too.
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| January 12th, 2005 12:36 AM |
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| glencar |
The Koran seems to be where all the action is these days. Some of the Persian bitches are pretty fuckin' hot. |
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