When you play with David Lee Roth, blowjobs grow on trees- Steve Vai.
10th October 2007 01:47 PM
The jinn, my friend.
.
[Edited by The jinn, my friend.]
10th October 2007 01:49 PM
The jinn, my friend.
Photo by Tara.
In Front Of Your Naked Steaming Eyes
Photo by David
10th October 2007 03:32 PM
mojoman
quote:The jinn, my friend. wrote:
Photo by Tara.
Ah, you reach down, between my legs,
Ease the seat back.........
10th October 2007 03:38 PM
Some Guy
Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant and noticed that the
waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a
little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he
also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around saw that all the
staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?" "Well,
he explained, "The restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp
all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the
spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop
frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel
are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen
and save 15 man-hours per shift."
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with
his spare. "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of
making an extra trip to get it right now."
I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the
waiter's fly. Looking round, I noticed that all the waiters had the same
string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the
waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right
there?" "Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so
observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save
time in the restroom by tying this string to the tip of our 'you know what'.
That way, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to
wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent."
I asked, "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"
"Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.
[Edited by Some Guy]
10th October 2007 09:50 PM
robpop
quote:Some Guy wrote:
Postin'
11th October 2007 12:08 PM
Some Guy
It was a big nite,t!
John Soeder
Plain Dealer Pop Music Critic
"I waited a long, long time for this present," David Lee Roth told a packed house during Van Halen's comeback show Wednesday night at The Q. It was his 52nd birthday, six dates into the swaggering lead vocalist's first tour in 23 years with the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame-inducted group. The Van Halen brothers -- guitar hero Eddie and drummer Alex -- are in their 50s, too. Far be it from "Diamond Dave" to act his age, however.
When this incurable ham wasn't executing martial arts moves or slaying invisible dragons with his microphone stand, he shoved a fan's cell phone down his pants. Tossing it back, Roth quipped: "You're going to get a helluva picture!"
The rest of us got a helluva concert. The hard-rocking festivities roared to life with "You Really Got Me," followed by "I'm the One" and "Runnin' with the Devil."
Eddie's 16-year-old son, Wolfgang, handled bass-thumping duties. He replaced longtime band member Michael Anthony, dismissed because he fraternized with Roth's successor, Sammy Hagar. "And the Cradle Will Rock...," indeed.
Shy at first, Wolfgang loosened up as the evening went on. He capably provided backing vocals alongside his proud father, who kissed Wolfgang a few times. The kid was alright, despite the fact he wasn't even born the last time Van Halen 1.0 hit the road, back when Ronald Reagan was in the White House and parachute pants were the height of fashion.
Uncle Alex was no slouch, either. His driving backbeats were Hemi-powered.
Next to Roth, nobody appeared to have a better time than Eddie, who did a stint in rehab earlier this year for unspecified reasons. Looking fit and smiling often, the guitarist reaffirmed his status as one of the all-time greats, with a dazzling style all his own.
His 10-minute solo -- more of a soliloquy, really -- began with a few bars of "Happy Birthday" in honor of Roth, who hugged Eddie more than once. After years of bad feelings between these guys, this was a bona fide lovefest.
The set was stacked with crowd-pleasers such as "Dance the Night Away," "(Oh) Pretty Woman," "Unchained," "Hot for Teacher" and "Panama" -- in other words, "all the favorites you've been hearing tearing out of the back of a pickup truck at the Burger King drive-thru," as Roth put it recently. The band dusted off a few surprises, too, including "Atomic Punk" and "Romeo Delight."
Two hours after it began, the triumphant gig climaxed with "Jump," complete with canned synthesizer accompaniment. As confetti fell and a disco ball sent rays of light dancing around the venue, Roth mounted a giant inflatable microphone and rode it like a cowboy.
Clearly, you have to roll with the punches just to get surreal.
__________________
"Remember when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?"
11th October 2007 12:22 PM
Saint Sway
a couple key points that are clearly worth pointing out here... for you to rue on
quote:Some Guy wrote:
When this incurable ham wasn't executing martial arts moves or slaying invisible dragons with his microphone stand, he shoved a fan's cell phone down his pants.
Shy at first, Wolfgang loosened up as the evening went on. He capably provided backing vocals alongside his proud father, who kissed Wolfgang a few times. The kid was alright, despite the fact he wasn't even born the last time Van Halen 1.0 hit the road, back when Ronald Reagan was in the White House and parachute pants were the height of fashion.
Two hours after it began, the triumphant gig climaxed with "Jump," complete with canned synthesizer accompaniment. As confetti fell and a disco ball sent rays of light dancing around the venue, Roth mounted a giant inflatable microphone and rode it like a cowboy.
ahh yes... this must of been pulled straight from the pages of Spinal Tap...
lead singers slaying invisible dragons... 16 year old band members recruited from Menudo... canned synthesizer notes piped in... disco balls... fathers kissing their sons onstage... and some guy looking like a drunken insurance salesman after too many sake bombs at Karaoke night riding a giant inflatable microphone
11th October 2007 12:53 PM
The jinn, my friend.
11th October 2007 12:57 PM
Saint Sway
disgusting!!!
is that Some Guy's cock ring??
11th October 2007 01:03 PM
doo doo doo Dude
quote:Some Guy wrote:
It was a big nite,t!
John Soeder
Plain Dealer Pop Music Critic
"I waited a long, long time for this present," David Lee Roth told a packed house during Van Halen's comeback show Wednesday night at The Q. It was his 52nd birthday, six dates into the swaggering lead vocalist's first tour in 23 years with the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame-inducted group. The Van Halen brothers -- guitar hero Eddie and drummer Alex -- are in their 50s, too. Far be it from "Diamond Dave" to act his age, however.
When this incurable ham wasn't executing martial arts moves or slaying invisible dragons with his microphone stand, he shoved a fan's cell phone down his pants. Tossing it back, Roth quipped: "You're going to get a helluva picture!"
The rest of us got a helluva concert. The hard-rocking festivities roared to life with "You Really Got Me," followed by "I'm the One" and "Runnin' with the Devil."
Eddie's 16-year-old son, Wolfgang, handled bass-thumping duties. He replaced longtime band member Michael Anthony, dismissed because he fraternized with Roth's successor, Sammy Hagar. "And the Cradle Will Rock...," indeed.
Shy at first, Wolfgang loosened up as the evening went on. He capably provided backing vocals alongside his proud father, who kissed Wolfgang a few times. The kid was alright, despite the fact he wasn't even born the last time Van Halen 1.0 hit the road, back when Ronald Reagan was in the White House and parachute pants were the height of fashion.
Uncle Alex was no slouch, either. His driving backbeats were Hemi-powered.
Next to Roth, nobody appeared to have a better time than Eddie, who did a stint in rehab earlier this year for unspecified reasons. Looking fit and smiling often, the guitarist reaffirmed his status as one of the all-time greats, with a dazzling style all his own.
His 10-minute solo -- more of a soliloquy, really -- began with a few bars of "Happy Birthday" in honor of Roth, who hugged Eddie more than once. After years of bad feelings between these guys, this was a bona fide lovefest.
The set was stacked with crowd-pleasers such as "Dance the Night Away," "(Oh) Pretty Woman," "Unchained," "Hot for Teacher" and "Panama" -- in other words, "all the favorites you've been hearing tearing out of the back of a pickup truck at the Burger King drive-thru," as Roth put it recently. The band dusted off a few surprises, too, including "Atomic Punk" and "Romeo Delight."
Two hours after it began, the triumphant gig climaxed with "Jump," complete with canned synthesizer accompaniment. As confetti fell and a disco ball sent rays of light dancing around the venue, Roth mounted a giant inflatable microphone and rode it like a cowboy.
Clearly, you have to roll with the punches just to get surreal.
I'm yet to see a bad review of this tour (save Sway & Sammy Hagar)
Blowing doors indeed...
11th October 2007 01:03 PM
The jinn, my friend.
quote:Saint Sway wrote:
disgusting!!!
is that Some Guy's cock ring??
Cock ring?
You should ask him if he is pierced. However, that is not what a piercing looks like.
11th October 2007 01:06 PM
Some Guy
quote:Saint Sway wrote:
a couple key points that are clearly worth pointing out here... for you to rue on
ahh yes... this must of been pulled straight from the pages of Spinal Tap...
lead singers slaying invisible dragons... 16 year old band members recruited from Menudo... canned synthesizer notes piped in... disco balls... fathers kissing their sons onstage... and some guy looking like a drunken insurance salesman after too many sake bombs at Karaoke night riding a giant inflatable microphone
Rue not amigo-
It was The Toastmaster Generals Birthday yesterday.
11th October 2007 01:07 PM
Saint Sway
quote:The jinn, my friend. wrote:
Cock ring?
You should ask him if he is pierced. However, that is not what a piercing looks like.
thats cool, jinn, my friend. I'll take your word for it.
11th October 2007 06:47 PM
The jinn, my friend.
quote:Some Guy wrote:
Rue not amigo-
It was The Toastmaster Generals Birthday yesterday.
wrong hand and wrong day. opps....
Photo by B
13th October 2007 11:00 AM
Some Guy
Toronto 10-12-2007-
[Edited by Some Guy]
13th October 2007 11:06 AM
sirmoonie
quote:Some Guy wrote:
Toronto 10-12-2007-
If you listen really closely to your left woofer, and way past Eddie's crunching power slam balls guitar riffs, you can hear a few geeks quietly rueing away in the background. Soundboard take care of that on the boot, I reckon.
13th October 2007 11:08 AM
Some Guy
quote:sirmoonie wrote:
If you listen really closely to your left woofer, and way past Eddie's crunching power slam balls guitar riffs, you can hear a few geeks quietly rueing away in the background. Soundboard take care of that on the boot, I reckon.
Nobel postin prize material postin right there.
14th October 2007 05:52 PM
Joey
quote:Some Guy wrote:
Nobel postin prize material postin right there.
Say that real fast three times .........
Say that real fast three times .........
Say that real fast three times .........
15th October 2007 02:00 PM
Some Guy
Joey!?
15th October 2007 02:16 PM
Fiji Joe
"Part II" of this thread serves as indisputable proof that homosexuality is not just a fad...and the Jimmy Buffet thread you guys got planned next...don't...just don't
15th October 2007 02:23 PM
Some Guy
"Warner Brothers has worked out a deal to issue a "Kissology" style DVD set of Van Halen material. It would be a multi-disc set with all early promotional videos, including Running With The Devil, You Really Got Me and Pretty Woman (which, as we all know, were left off the "Video Hits" release), the long-lost Showtime Concert, US Festival footage and various other odds and ends.
Basically, the idea is to make it a collection of pre-1984 Van Halen material, and go with the same idea as KISS did, which is that the quality of the footage isn't as important when you give them so much material. It'll be a big summer, tater."
[Edited by Some Guy]
15th October 2007 02:43 PM
Maxlugar
quote:Some Guy wrote:
I really wish Eddie would go easier on that new hip of his. The five year or 50,000 mile warranty has got to be up by now.
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