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| steel driving hammer |
[quote]Dandelion* wrote:
I would pay anything to see the look on his boss's face as he was reading the Joey posts...
;^) or mine...
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| sirmoonie |
I dunno man, I just don't know. Maybe it all started when those guys went frolicking in the surf down by Lake Erie. I mean that line "sand in places I never knew existed" must have meant something, no? A precursor to what unfolded next? Then again it could have been hanging out under the diving board during the "midnight swim." Or the funny games with the chili fries and popcorn swirls. Hell, it could have been any number of things.
My point is that they ascribed to a lifestyle that while foreign to us, shouldn't have made us force their hand the way we did. We could have done better by them. And now its too late.
Rest in peace, Joe. Sometimes, you were our best mascot ever. |
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| nankerphelge |
What clinched it for me was at the bar at the Hard Rock -- he walked up to Steelie, peered into into his eyes with a look of humourous familiarity and with that cute lisp whispered "mind if I push in your stool?"
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| Joey |
" I am ashamed now....but I GLOATED! I sent him a Joe Paterno mask. I made fun of Nebraska. I told him that the Lions ripped the Huskers hearts out, and that their season would go in the shitter.
AND IT DID!!! Why, oh why, do I always have to be right?
Now he's gone, AND IT ALL MY FAULT! I TAUNTED HIM TO DEATH!!! I'm a bad knight, a very very bad knight.
What I wouldn't give to see Joey dance like a clown just one more time....."
Here I is !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So it WAS a Joe Paterno mask you sent me ....................damn thing looks nasty .
Stoney , just wait , Nebraska's season has turned around and now I hunger for the Texas game Saturday night .............look for me on television at the stadium ( Fox Sports Net )around 6:30 CDT -- I will be the one wearing red .
Yeah , I have got to lay low for a couple of weeks -- Carly has really put the HEAT on me .
" Time for a new job Ronnie "
Kunta Joe
{{{ TOBY }}}}
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| sirmoonie |
I missed that one Nanky, but there was this one time when I really should have figured something was wrong. It was late, real late. The moon wasn't even out anymore thats how late it was. I'm off by myself, dwelling on the beautiful Stonesian evening I had just experienced, when Steelie sidles up to me and says "Helloooooo there." I go "Hey, nice pantaloons. Don't know if they are appropriate, but they are still pretty cool, dude." We exchange high-fives. Then Steelie sidles up a bit closer, now he's invading my personal space, and says "Aren't they erotic?"
You guys have met me. You know I sweat testosterone from every pore, so you know I can count on one hand the number of times some wayward flit has tried to put the moves on me. As a result, I'm pretty oblivious to it.
But this got me nervous. I'm thinking "Man, is this dude making me for his pidgeon? Me?" Then I was like "Nahh, you're just drunk me." So I says to Steelie "I dunno man, I just think they're ok is all. You know?" I'm trying to be nice and appreciative of other cultures. I'm like that.
Then Steelie leans real close, I can smell the wine on his breath, and I can tell he is emboldened by the alcohol flowing through his vascular system. He slurs to me "I got a negative test in my pocket and its only three days old. Wanna go, hey?"
Now I'm like "Whoah. Does this dude piss sitting down? What the hell is going on here?" I look around the squalor of the hotel room for some help. I can barely see for the smoke, but it appears everyone is passed out or doing their own "thing." But then I see Joey in the corner. He's there. Watching like he always does. That bastard. I say to Joey "Duuuuuuuddde! What the fuck! Are you fucked up or what? Duuuuuuuuddde! Rock and rolllllll!" I make some motions with the can of beer in my hand, like you know, hey its a party.
Joey lurches over with that perma-grin of his. I say to them "Do you guys know each other? Joey, Steelie. Steelie, Joey. If you guys will excuse me, I gotta go piss in the sink and grab another Ying."
I didn't have to piss or grab a Ying. I wanted out. Free of this "scene." Free of it all. Things were not what they seemed.
As I staggered around the passed out bodies, my only thoughts were getting through that door to the hall. I opened it and rushed outside, but I couldn't resist one look back.
My god, to this day, I wish I hadn't. |
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| kath |
sadly, i never knew "joey"...but i guess the important thing now is, ARE WE GONNA DIG HIM UP?????? |
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| Maxlugar |
I think we'll wait a bit to dig him up.
They are still doing the autopsy.
Seems the X-rays have found some rather large objects in some very tight places.
They're just trying to figure it all out, ya know?
But next year, at the North Carolina summit, we're gonna dig him up but good.
We'll take him around ala Weekend at Bernie's.
He would have wanted it that way.
Poor dead fuck.
{{{{{{{MAXY!!!}}}}}}} |
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| kath |
book your reservations now. |
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| sirmoonie |
Its too bad you never got to meet him Kath. He used to splash around in the tub, all happy like with one of those red clown noses on, then he'd stand up, lather himself up with Mr. Bubbles and do a "Whirlybird." Oh, how we used laugh and laugh. I miss the Joe. |
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| 2000 Man |
Wow. What a fun thread. What a fun place you kids have here of late. Dead Joey's. Petitions for Brian Jones complete with "The Canadian Factor." I HAD to stop by and say, "hello."
Thus, with my posting here, I do believe that the entire C10 has now made their presence felt. SS, got your package, thank you. I must say though, that I found it amusing to read about your Nittany Lions, as they crumbled at the feet of the scarlet and grey last weekend. Byt the way - what IS a Nittany, anyway? Is it what a ninny turns into when it grows up? Enough of that - I really need to package up your stuff and get it on its merry way towards the Happy Valley area (generally speaking, I guess.)
For those of you that don't know me, I am 2000 Man. The maker of milk stout, rocker extraordinaire, and generally good speller. I am an expert in one area, and that area is "what I like." My opinion is never humble, it just is. I post with a giant Dirty work promo poster above my desk, and from it I glean inspiration, and occasionally a strong pining for the "Tour That Should Have Been."
I can certify that Exile On Main St. is truly man's crowning achievement. Nothing more, nothing less. Never be fooled by lists or critics saying otherwise. Exile On Main St. is the hand of God hisself caressing your cheek and then smacking you in the forehead while exclaiming, "Get up and DANCE! You know you can do the Hip Shake, and you can do it to every song!" What Nicky Hopkins does on the piano in Rip This Joint is gone from us now, and none shall ever know how to do it like that again. If you ever are hungry, or cold, or wet, Exile On Main St. can take care of all three of those things for you, because that's why Exile is here.
I am firmly in the Maxy camp with regards to Dirty Work. Just let it rock your little ass off. Don't fight it. Undercover is a brilliant album. If there had been no Rolling Stones, and a band created Undercover, Dirty Work, Steel Wheels, Voodoo Lounge, Bridges To Babylon and called it quits, they woud have been considered one of the finest modern rock acts EVER! Don't fight it, let it wash over you and bathe you in golden goodness.
Pleased to meet you.... |
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| sirmoonie |
The holy See. Ten.
Twas predicted this would happen. Out of the heavens.
Covenant foresworn. A slash foregone.
The earth has moved. Teutonic plates have collided.
Rapture. Is no more. Now and then. You, I, them, and they exist in the world. It is that. |
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| parmeda |
Damn...you don't check in for a few days and shit hits the fan. Litterally!
Maxy, my heart went to my throat when I first saw your thread...been laughing to tears all the way through it. I won't even question the validity of any of the posts...omg!...poor Joey!
2000 Man...have heard some of the tales, it's nice to meet the man.
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| VoodooChileInWOnderl |
Rocks Off hero laid to rest
By Yokero Tu Chiko
Story filled March 27, 2182
LOS ANGELES (AP) - Joey, who was killed by Sunday's suicide bomb as he and two other Rocks Off regulars wrestled with a Beatleasian terrorist outside Uranus, was buried at the Satelite Station 38, Monday.
Joey, Joey! He is not dead, he doth not sleep -
He has awakened from the dream of life
Cough... cough... gh gghghg ghhghas asdasd$#"$#"$$#"
Said childhood friend Keith Richards in his funeral oration. "And now, suddenly just my cockroaches, a few friends and I remain healthy. Life is a Bitch" added Richards.
Then the people attending the funeral started a march to take Joey to his grave.
(AP Photo/Startraks Photo, Gered Mankowitz) |
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| stonedinaustralia |
with props to nanker, a fitting epitaph, perhaps,
HERE LIES KUNTA JOEY
"CHIBA CHIBARE CHIBATUS"
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| Maxlugar |
Nice ode to Joey, Voodoo. His stinking, rotting body would have loved it.
It's a good thing his death has brought 2000 Man back to us. And even though one of us is a stiff, cold, marble-like corpse, we can still be known as the C10.
Great to see you 2000 Man. I have been needing a Dirty Work defender around here.
MAXY!
[Edited by Maxlugar] |
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| Factory Girl |
Howdy, 2000 Man. |
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| TheSavageYoungXyzzy |
Hallo hallo, 2000 Man - I always wondered who the mysterious tenth member of C10 was...
As for our dead friend The Joey...
I think we need a petition.
A petition to find the truth behind Joey's death!
I have set up a petition!
It must be signed!
I charge all of you, re-open the case!
http://www.PetitionOnline.com/joey1234/petition.html
Go! Now! Sign! Find out what happens when a high-school student gets bored!
-tSYX --- Only get 'em off, get 'em off! |
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| nankerphelge |
Wow -- my heart soars to see the C10's most gracious host - 2000 Man -- at Rocks Off!
Too bad about Joey huh... |
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| steel driving hammer |
So ya'll, who's playing better this time?
Ronnie or Keaf?
Still think it's Keaf. |
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| sirmoonie |
Remember that time Joey had on all that snorkel gear? And he said he was going "shrimping"? Yeah suuuuure, Joey. And the cherry flavored vaseline is to keep them fresh till you get home. Suuuure. I gotcha ya.
But it is sad. I hope nobody really wants to dig him or Brian Jones up. Thats really fucking creepy, if you ask me. Digging up some dude thats been dead for over 30 years. To what end? I mean, what do you get out of digging up some stiff? "Hmmm, this inhaler that ole spazzie was buried with is full of green placebo juice. Foul play? Hmmmmm. Hmmmmm. Yep, foul play. Uh....ok boys, throw him back in. I'll write up a report saying he died under suspicious circumstances. That should shut them loons up for a few years. You guys wanna grab a pint later?" |
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| 2000 Man |
Digging up Joey shouldn't be so bad, though. He's probably just starting to smell a little like french cheese. In fact, just thinking about his pasty white complexion reminds me of brie.
I wonder if Joey tasted like brie when he was alive. Steelie, you know - was Joey tasty like brie? |
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| Martha |
And here I thought I'd become depressed..... you know....withdraw into my little world after seeing the Stones 3x' in 9 days...and not knowing if or when I get to see them again.....
Then I come here and find that our beloved Joey was killed off (inadvertently and unintentionally by SS's persistent needling of Joey's favorite team)....
I'm sure SOMEONE can forgive you SS......but don't look at me...I'm not equipped for such matters.
And now life is all sunny and bright again. To cheer me up like this is a real feat my friends, a real feat indeed. And yet you do it so effortlessly.
Do we give out awards like Oscars or Emmy's for such creativity? Well we should. Then we'd be sure to get that book deal Savage and Young is pushing for.
And........Welcome 2000 Man. I've gotta get my own copy of "Dirty Work" now that you've given such a ringing endorsement....I'll surrender..or yes I will.
On "Exile"...I heartily concur..no truer words were ever spoken. The cure for any ailment indeed.
Dear Joey....How I will miss you my friend....
who will leave little surprises in Gypsy's underware drawer...
who will call me Princess....
who will keep Ronnie on the straight and narrow with those constant little reminders from you that Mick Taylor is still waiting in the wings..................
arrrrrrrrgh...
Can't he come back again..... ever????
As a ghost perhaps?
Or as his own evil twin?
CAN'T ANYTHING BE DONE!
I may need to be sedated.
R.I.P.
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| sirmoonie |
Steelie and Joey gave new meaning to the term "Fruit Loops." Remember? That whole bit in the back of the car with the Crazy Straws and the purple gumballs? If I live to be a thousand, I'll never understand how they worked that one. Especially without spilling anything. |
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| steel driving hammer |
I am so confused! Please help me understand! |
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| nankerphelge |
Oh Martha -- how wise you are. Steelie proudly flaunted his blue dress with a lil', you know... "stain" on it! It should take little effort to clone our young boy Joey from the DNA contained therein. Now we all know the perils of cloning ... for example, Dolly the cloned sheep has no sexual drive (not like regular sheep that have a healthy drive, but often withhold as a weapon. Cloven hooved beasts!) Anyhow, cloned Joey might be a bit, shall we say, odd -- but my bet is we'll hardly notice a difference.
[Edited by nankerphelge] |
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| steel driving hammer |
Yeah Whatever. |
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| nankerphelge |
Oh Steelie, don't get all pissed off -- you know we all love ya -- in a very hands off, back to the wall, manly kind of way... |
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| steel driving hammer |
What did Factory Girl tell you?
So when's the No Security of the Licks tour CD comming out?
Need a sound board straight from the lord.
I'm not gay btw...I just play one on TV. |
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| Maxlugar |
Friggin' Moonie is on fire!
Don't Stop, Moooooonie, Don't Stop!
Yes! |
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| steel driving hammer |
Maxlugar, I can't get enough of that song.
Heard the 4 track single is even better.
Love Keiths open strum. Love it, need it and cherish it. |
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