| 21st October 2006 02:36 PM |
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| MrPleasant |
http://enjoyment.independent.co.uk/film/features/article1902879.ece
THE WORST CLUNKERS
There are, of course, treasurably bad lines in the movies. Coming in last - or first, depending on how you look at it - is this clanger by Sylvester Stallone in Rocky 4 (1985) as the bruiser making a case for universal love and understanding: "If I can change, and you can change, then we can all change." Got that?
Other lines so bad they're good include Tom Cruise as Jerry Maguire (1996), smarming to the object of his affections before a man-hating women's support group: "I love you. You complete me." And then there's Val Kilmer's Tom Kasanzky to Cruise's Lt Pete Mitchell in Top Gun (1986): "You can be my wingman any time."
How about Andie McDowell as Carrie, resembling nothing so much as a drowned rat, to the sodden Hugh Grant in the downpour that marks the end of Four Weddings and a Funeral (1993): "Is it raining? I hadn't noticed." Or Sean Connery in Goldfinger (1964), cracking a crime ring and keeping straight-faced long enough to deliver the line: "At least they won't be using heroin-flavoured bananas to finance revolutions."
You could fill a phone book with atrocious lines from sci-fi and horror movies, but we'll content ourselves with two examples. Here's Roddy Piper in John Carpenter's They Live (1988) as Nada: "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum." And, from Flash Gordon (1986): "I love you, Flash, but we only have 14 hours to save the Earth."
.................................
They forgot:
"I'm the king of the world!!!"
Because I hate that movie.
Or "Life is like a box of chocolates. I'm an idiot".
From Cameron Crowe, again:
"I want you to get into the deep beautiful melancholy of everything that's happened." (Elizabethtown)
"Because we have a moment here, let me tell you that I have recently become a secret connoisseur of 'last looks'. You know the way people look at you when they believe it's for the last time? I've started collecting these looks." (Elizabethtown)
"Can you imagine an entire life wrapped up in a shoe?" (Elizabethtown)
"I'm going to miss your lips. And everything attached to them." (Elizabethtown)
"I think she's the saddest girl to ever to hold a martini." (Vanilla Sky) (!!!!!!!!!)
And, from Plan 9 (which sound way better than Crowe's shit; didn't he write Fast Times At Ridgemont High - what the hell is wrong with him?):
"Visits? That would indicate visitors."
Colonel Tom Edwards: "This is the most fantastic story I've ever heard."
Jeff Trent: "And every word of it's true, too."
Colonel Tom Edwards: "That's the fantastic part of it."
Detective: "But one thing's sure. Inspector Clay is dead, murdered, and somebody's responsible."
Paula Trent: "I've never seen you in this mood before."
Jeff Trent: "I guess that's because I've never been in this mood before."
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| 21st October 2006 02:39 PM |
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| Paranoid_Android |
If they can do it me...they can do it to YOOOOOOUUUUU!!
Sandra Bullock...in the industries most poingnat techno-film...THE NET |
| 21st October 2006 02:49 PM |
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| MrPleasant |
quote:
Paranoid_Android wrote:
If they can do it me...they can do it to YOOOOOOUUUUU!!
Sandra Bullock...in the industries most poingnat techno-film...THE NET
Sounds like a classic! Speaking of which, youtube hosts Plan 9. Watch it if you haven't done it yet!, before the bastards take it away!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5zyeI-GAx4 |
| 22nd October 2006 01:40 AM |
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| Egbert |
Just watched "Foxes" today and can tell you that there are some clunkers in there. |
| 22nd October 2006 02:08 AM |
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| Trey Krimsin |
Every line Arnold Schwartzenegger (hope I spelled that right) spoke in the Batman & Robin flick. Horrendous!!!! |
| 22nd October 2006 04:35 AM |
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| JumpingKentFlash |
I think it's spelled "Schwarzenegger".
There's one missing here for sure. Jennifer Lopez about to give Ben Affleck a blowjob in "Gigli": "It's turkey time. Gobble gobble". |
| 22nd October 2006 08:30 AM |
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| corgi37 |
Not really a single line, but the amount of time the words "complete" and "Destiny" are said in Return of the Jedi. |
| 22nd October 2006 09:37 AM |
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| Sir Stonesalot |
"Stoned".
Frank grills some sausage by the pool and serves it to Brian. Brian takes a bite, and wrinkles up his face.
"Frank, these sausages are substandard."
To be fair...this was one of the outtakes. Still, they put it on the DVD. It should have been buried in a deep dark hole instead. |
| 22nd October 2006 11:48 AM |
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| BILL PERKS |
quote:
Sir Stonesalot wrote:
"Stoned".
Frank grills some sausage by the pool and serves it to Brian. Brian takes a bite, and wrinkles up his face.
"Frank, these sausages are substandard."
To be fair...this was one of the outtakes. Still, they put it on the DVD. It should have been buried in a deep dark hole instead.
WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE MOVIE? |
| 22nd October 2006 12:27 PM |
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| Sir Stonesalot |
I thought the movie was boring. The acting was really bad...but not bad enough to be good. It was just bad.
The question that I have is...who the fuck did they think was gonna wanna watch it? Hardcore Stones fans, and ....who else? I can't imagine anyone other than people like us being the least bit interested in the story.
It's worth putting on yer Netflix Que...but that's about it. |
| 22nd October 2006 01:28 PM |
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| MrPleasant |
quote:
corgi37 wrote:
Not really a single line, but the amount of time the words "complete" and "Destiny" are said in Return of the Jedi.
From Episode II:
Padme: "Please don't look at me like that."
Anakin: "Why not?"
Padme: "Because it makes me feel uncomfortable."
Anakin: "Sorry my lady."
"Your clones are very impressive. You must be very proud."
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| 22nd October 2006 01:47 PM |
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| BONOISLOVE |
quote:
Trey Krimsin wrote:
Every line Arnold Schwartzenegger (hope I spelled that right) spoke in the Batman & Robin flick. Horrendous!!!!
Arnie used to be so strong and he used to have big breasts. Bono thinks that that man needs to go on a diet. I recommend grapefruit juice, coffee, no cream, toast and lots of water. |
| 22nd October 2006 03:48 PM |
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| M.O.W.A.T. |
From Rattle & Hum:
"Charles Manson stole this song from the Beatles, we're stealing it back!"  |
| 22nd October 2006 03:50 PM |
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| WattsAtScotts |
quote:
BONOISLOVE wrote:
Arnie used to be so strong and he used to have big breasts. Bono thinks that that man needs to go on a diet. I recommend grapefruit juice, coffee, no cream, toast and lots of water.
Go fuck Oprah |
| 22nd October 2006 03:55 PM |
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| BONOISLOVE |
quote:
WattsAtScotts wrote:
Go fuck Oprah
You make Bono weep desperately. WHY? WHY??? |
| 22nd October 2006 03:57 PM |
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| WattsAtScotts |
quote:
BONOISLOVE wrote:
You make Bono weep desperately. WHY? WHY???
U might like it? |
| 22nd October 2006 04:08 PM |
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| BONOISLOVE |
quote:
WattsAtScotts wrote:
U might like it?
The Edge is more into verbal stuff. Last night I yelled at him for not letting me use the remote and he gave me one of those funny looks that only a little boy would give to his father. It was a blessing in disguise. |
| 22nd October 2006 04:10 PM |
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| WattsAtScotts |
quote:
BONOISLOVE wrote:
The Edge is more into verbal stuff. Last night I yelled at him for not letting me use the remote and he gave me one of those funny looks that only a little boy would give to his father. It was a blessing in disguise.
Where can I get product Red |
| 22nd October 2006 04:13 PM |
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| BONOISLOVE |
quote:
WattsAtScotts wrote:
Where can I get product Red
You make very important questions to Bono. Sadly, all my shoppings are made by Eno. |
| 22nd October 2006 04:14 PM |
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| WattsAtScotts |
quote:
BONOISLOVE wrote:
You make very important questions to Bono. Sadly, all my shoppings are made by Eno.
Everyone should speak in the third person |
| 22nd October 2006 04:16 PM |
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| BONOISLOVE |
quote:
WattsAtScotts wrote:
Everyone should speak in the third person
You make Bono's face red. |
| 22nd October 2006 04:30 PM |
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| egon |
this seems to be a good time to introduce the worst film ever;
http://imdb.com/title/tt0288243/
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| 22nd October 2006 04:32 PM |
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| WattsAtScotts |
My all time fav movie is The Rocky Horror Picture Show, with Shock Treatment close behind it, I'm big into Cult movies |
| 23rd October 2006 07:36 AM |
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| corgi37 |
Cult movies rock!
I'm after Punishment Park. Its on dvd, but not here in Oz, and shipping makes it a tad expensive.
And, The Hitchers - though its virtually impossible to get.
And you just know that i am angling for G-a-s-s-s & Wild in the streets double dvd. Christmas i think.
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| 23rd October 2006 10:41 AM |
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| jb |
"I'll be back". |
| 23rd October 2006 11:08 AM |
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| nanatod |
quote:
M.O.W.A.T. wrote:
From Rattle & Hum:
"Charles Manson stole this song from the Beatles, we're stealing it back!"
I respectfully disagree. That line is the only line that Bono has ever spoken in his life, that I can stand. |
| 23rd October 2006 04:06 PM |
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| SheRat |
I'm sorry, egon, but THIS is the worst movie ever:
"The elderly Coleman (Jason Robards) and the young and brash Bobby (Corey Feldman) learn what life is like from each other's point of view when their bodies are unwittingly switched by way of transcendental meditation. But they're not alone on their strange journey; Coleman's wife, Gina (Piper Laurie), is renewed in the body of Lainie (Meredith Salenger), the girlfriend of Bobby's best friend (Corey Haim). Can they switch back?" |
| 23rd October 2006 04:17 PM |
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| Joey |
quote:
BILL PERKS wrote:
WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE MOVIE?
I do not particularly care for your Avatar |
| 23rd October 2006 04:23 PM |
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| Joey |
In the classic film " Jenna loves Rocco " , Jenna Jameson utters ( unintelligiably and actually quite garbled ) , " Rocco ..... you push my Brain Button " .
Word . |
| 23rd October 2006 04:25 PM |
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| pdog |
quote:
Joey wrote:
In the classic film " Joey loves Cocko " , Joey utters ( unintelligiably and actually quite garbled ) , " Cocko ..... you push my Poop Button " .
Wurd .
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