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| Joey |
I masterbated this morning !
It's True !!!!!!!!
JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJERKY ! |
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| jb |
Australians like to masterbate as well... |
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| Martha |
IBS...JB, you must mean "Idiotic amounts of BullShit"? For that ailment I'm afraid there is no known cure.
However for Irritable Bowel Syndrome....I've heard if you start dealing with your pent up anger and rage (which is all about your pain) you'll be amazed!
Can someone say "flush it Ronnie"?!
I for one, am as regular as a timex clock.
Dr. Martha
P.S. Hey there Gypsy and FPM C-10! Good to chat with you .....I love you both!!!!!!
P.S.S. I love you TOO Joey!!!!
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| nankerphelge |
Speaking of IBS -- did you know Alex was back from San Fran!!!
"Pack it with gauze Ronnie" |
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| gypsy |
Hey! Joey and jb, i's M-A-S-T-U-R-B-A-T-E. With a "U." It's comical watching you two try to spell.
Yeah, SS, you wouldn't want to waste good coke on those sinuses...you wouldn't get to enjoy the 'drain.'
Martha really gave the best advice...follow it to a "T."
Martha, I'm so envious...you're 'regular?' I'm one of those who cannot go in a public bathroom. When I was young, and had to go to camp for a week, I would hold it the ENTIRE time.
FG, sorry none of those worked for you. They didn't work for me either. Prednisone really works the best...or the 'dose pack.' I can't remember the name of the 'dose pack.' But, you take six the first day...and it dwindles on down to one on the last day...it really works well...but, like prednisone, it will bloat you. But, as long as you're not on it for years or something, it shouldn't do much harm. I also think an 800mg of Ibuprofen works really well. I would definitely get a second opinion...there are so many horrible orthopods out there. I work with one who had to take his medical exam 6 times before he got his license...and he has a really good rep here, because of his father. I wish you all the luck with the knee...is it your ACL? |
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| steel driving hammer |
Lady Heather Mills McCartney, wife of singer Sir Paul McCartney, shows talk show host Larry King the differences between two artificial legs, one made in the United Kingdom and one made in the United States, which she holds during a taping of the CNN program 'Larry King Live,' in Los Angeles September 22, 2003. Both McCartney and her husband are goodwill ambassadors for the United Nations Foundation's 'Adopt A Landmine' program, which assists in clearing landmines and aiding vicitms of landmine injuries.
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| Factory Girl |
Gypsy, whats ACL?
Jb, have your secretary give you an EMINEM...
"Can you say 'Yikes' Ronnie???  |
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| gypsy |
I don't remember what ACL stands for...but I have a few friends who have had to have surgery on their ACL's...and they had to take anti-inflammatory meds as well. Here's a little site that tells about it:
http://www.arthroscopy.com/sp05018.htm.
What's an 'EMINEM?' Is it like an enema?
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| Boomy |
I believe it stands for Anterior Crucient Ligament...many football players injure this ligament and have to work very hard to get back on the field. |
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| Factory Girl |
Thank you gypsy!
Yes, EMINEM is a bag of poop. So, to me he and an enema are one and same. |
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| Factory Girl |
gypsy, I can't get into the link. Please post again. TIA! |
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| steel driving hammer |
I thought Linda McCartney has Anterior Crucient Ligament? |
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| Joey |
" Martha, I'm so envious...you're 'regular?' I'm one of those who cannot go in a public bathroom. When I was young, and had to go to camp for a week, I would hold it the ENTIRE time. "
That speaks VOLUMES my Princess .
Oh Oh , speaking of volumes !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
**** JOEY getting up from desk and running to the bathroom ****
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| steel driving hammer |
"Martha, I'm so envious...you're 'regular?' I'm one of those who cannot go in a public bathroom. When I was young, and had to go to camp for a week, I would hold it the ENTIRE time."
I'm that way too honey.
Should of seen me at the C-10 Meeting!
I was so fucking nervous w/ all those Die Hard Stones Crazies I couldn't urinate!
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| gypsy |
That's the last time I share anything personal with you bastards...I shoud've known y'all would give me 'shit' for that. Joey sent me a gift basket stocked with Metamucil and Milk of Magnesia. |
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| steel driving hammer |
Hope this makes a some smile.
http://www.sublimedirectory.com/mow.wmv
[Edited by steel driving hammer] |
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| Joey |
" I was so fucking nervous w/ all those Die Hard Stones Crazies I couldn't urinate! "
Shy Bladder ?!?!?!?!
" Jai Baby Ronnie "
Jerky Boy !
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| steel driving hammer |
I remember in the 2nd grade, I asked the teacher if I could use the bathroom and she said no. I really had to go btw, so I went in my pants. A few minutes later, she saw I was wet, so the teacher lets me go and the only underwear they had in the Priciples office was for little girls, so they give me those and as I'm changing, the bell rings and some kids come in while I was cleaning and saw me in little girls underwear and they heard what happend and laughed and laughed and laughed.
I cried all that night.
True story. |
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| Martha |
quote:
steel driving hammer wrote:
I remember in the 2nd grade, I asked the teacher if I could use the bathroom and she said no. I really had to go btw, so I went in my pants. A few minutes later, she saw I was wet, so the teacher lets me go and the only underwear they had in the Priciples office was for little girls, so they give me those and as I'm changing, the bell rings and some kids come in while I was cleaning and saw me in little girls underwear and they heard what happend and laughed and laughed and laughed.
I cried all that night.
True story.
Steelie, you will now and forever more be loved by me for sharing that childhood trauma on the board. I had my little accident walking home from school at around the same age and time......didn't quite make it home before the river let go. I felt so ashamed and entered the house in tears prolly scaring my Mother half to death. Just so you know.....I understand.
Those mean ass grade school teachers...they must not know that WE, the proud members of Rocks Off, will....piss ANYWHERE man! |
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| Martha |
Steelie...PM me with your mailing addy. I have your Greendale show 6/14/03 ready to go out! |
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| jb |
Martha-IBS is indeed a result of stress manifesting itself in stomach pain...it is often treated with anti-depressants...
Gypsy-my spelling is horrendously appalling....it is the result of dictating into a little machine for the past 15 years and lack of reading. |
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| parmeda |
Damn, I'm a day late and a dollar short!
SS...thank you so much! I hope you're feeling better...stuffy heads are killers. Here's a little contribution to maybe make you laugh the snot outta yer skull.
mmwwhhaaa! take care of yourself...
*******************************
How to tell if you are gay:
1. If you are over 30 and you have a washboard stomach, you are gay.
It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the boys and rather you've been suckin-off the boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet.
2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaaay-ming fag.
A cat is like a dog, but gay: It grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed. And just think about how you call a dog...."Killer, come here! I said get your ass over here!"
Now think about how you call a cat....."Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!"
Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so gay.
3. If you suck on lolipops, Ring-Pops, baby pacifiers, or any such nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord.
A straight man only sucks bar-b-que ribs, crab-claws, raw oysters, craw-fish guts, pickled pigs feet, or titties. Anything else and you are in training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a fag.
4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or piss in a parking lot, you're in a deep homosexual relationship. A man's world is his bathroom, he defecates and urinates where he pleases.
5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you like a high hard one in the poop-chute.
Coffee is to be had strong, black (or with thick, wholesome milk) and full-aroma.
A pussy-eating man will never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim" and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener tastes like. If you've had Nutrasweet in your mouth, you've had a dick there too.
6. If you know more than six names of colors or four different types of dessert, you might as well be handing out free passes to your ass.
A real man doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap as well as all the names of all the players in the Major League, NFL, college ball, PGA & Nascar.
If you can pick out chartreusse or you know what a "fresier" is, you're gay.
And if you can name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are faggadocious!
7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it...you hungry for meat-popsicle.
A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-ass driver or to cut the motherfucker off.
The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat his hamburger, hold his beer, finger the bi-atch in the passenger seat (whoever she happens to be), or, if he's Latino, talk on his cell-phone.
8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films, mon-frere, vous sonnez le Gay, oui?
The only time it is acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above films by yourself or with another man is likely to result in SHC (Spontaneous Homosexual Combustion), which is what happens to fags when they flame out too quickly. |
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| Factory Girl |
Lol,parmeda. The Nutrasweet thing is sooo true. |
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| Joey |
" I remember in the 2nd grade, I asked the teacher if I could use the bathroom and she said no. I really had to go btw, so I went in my pants. A few minutes later, she saw I was wet, so the teacher lets me go and the only underwear they had in the Priciples office was for little girls, so they give me those and as I'm changing, the bell rings and some kids come in while I was cleaning and saw me in little girls underwear and they heard what happend and laughed and laughed and laughed.
I cried all that night.
True story. "
What did I tell you about drinking so much during the day .
Ah , does that grade school have a web site by chance ?
Developing ........................................
Jercee !
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| steel driving hammer |
quote:
Joey wrote:
Ah , does that grade school have a web site by chance ?
Sure it does, www.judah.org
Or
http://www.judah.org/Getting.html |
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| Sir Stonesalot |
SHC...SDH...
Coincidence???
I think not. |
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| MarthaMyDear |
Oh, thank you, SS!!! lol............................. It's nice to be associated
with Sid....
ROTFLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nevermind!!!
ROTFLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P 
 I'm playing... lol....................... Actually, you hit the nail right
on the head... I do EVERYTHING MY WAY and with two fingers up
in the air, a curled lip, and please don't give me a fucking gun!!!
ROTFLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
lol........................ Seriously, though... I was too late in trying
to make you laugh here, unfortunately, because I've had to work
alot lately but if it is ok. (?!?!?!), I would LOVE a copy (but not right
now 'cause I just can't deal with a post office right now... Not unless
you give me a gun.. JUST PLAYING!!!
ROTFLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
), but what I'm saying is... What size t-shirt do you wear and
please PM me your mailing address, ok. (yes, I am an
EXTREMELY safe person and not a nut... Well... NUTTY, but NOT
a NUT!!! CRACKING-
UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P )?!?!?!
I want to send you something for Christmas... I am
deadly broke right now so it will have to wait until then, if that is ok.
(?!?!?!)... And, I will trade it for this CD!!! Let me know if that is ok.
and I hope to talk to you SOON!!! I'm not
taking no for an answer, either!!! Anyways, take care, PEACE, and
DO ROCK ON!!! PEACE!!!
*** Martha ***
P.S. (What I mean is... I will trade around Christmas time but
hopefully sooner once I get out of debt...
lol......................................................... :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
Anyways, take care, PEACE, and DO ROCK ON!!!
PEACE!!! )
[Edited by MarthaMyDear] |
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| Cant Catch Me |
Okay, so Parmeda's given us the rundown on how to tell if you are yourself a homo.
But here's the number one, infallible way to tell if your roommate's gay . . .
. . . his dick tastes like shit!
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| stonedinaustralia |
quote:
jb wrote:
Gypsy-my spelling is horrendously appalling....it is the result of dictating into a little machine for the past 15 years and lack of reading.
but jb, don't you settle your correspondence and court docs. before signing them off - or do you have an implicit trust in the secretary (who, heavens knows, may not have her mind entirely on the job as she day dreams about the end of the day so that she and you can really "get down to (the) business") |
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| Joey |
" but jb, don't you settle your correspondence and court docs. before signing them off - or do you have an implicit trust in the secretary "
Josh once told me that his secretary can actually make a good cup of coffee .
Joey ! |
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